Sunday, June 05, 2005

The Revenge of 'Manos' the Hands of Fate

I was reading my new Entertainment Weekly and there was an article on 'Manos' the Hands of Fate...the worst movie ever made. Apparently it has received the lowest rating of all movies ever produced in the IMDb Bottom 100. I've actually seen this movie, and indeed it is the biggest bucket of whale shit ever committed to celluloid. I had seen it as one of the episodes of MST3K several years ago. It's funny because it stood out amongst my friends as perhaps the worst movie we had ever seen. It's nice to know that others feel the same way. The fact that EW has allotted a whole 5 pages to this pile of diseased yak feces is testament enough. Run, don't walk to your video store and try to find a copy. Also make sure to read the EW article. It's a pretty damn interesting read. My friends and I will never forget the character of "Torgo"...find out why. 'Manos' the Hands of Fate makes Ishtar look like 8 1/2, The 400 Blows, Wings of Desire, or Rashomon. Viewing this film is less pleasurable than jumping in a pool of alcohol and lemon juice with 1000 paper-cuts. It's so bad it makes Dubya look smart (almost). I would sooner lick a homeless person's moist crotch after a three day beer bender in the middle of August inside an above-ground glass septic tank in direct sunlight than take credit as this film's director. It's really that bad...really. Any movie that makes Battlefield Earth, Police Academy: Mission to Moscow, Glitter, Cool as Ice, or Gigli look like the work of Bergman, Fassbinder, Wenders, Fellini, Truffault, or Kubrick must really, really, really, really, really, really suck. It sucks a million jet engines worth of sucking. Be sure to check out the IMDb Bottom 100 and their IMDb Top 250 while you're at it. 'Manos' the Hands of Fate is the worst movie ever made...



Post a Comment

<< Home