Wednesday, May 09, 2007

"I am the lobster...goo goo g'joob!"

Hey kids!

It's hot today. I mean summer hot! What's up with that? I'm ready for snow again...

I really haven't done much since my last post seeing as I don't get out much and all. I did happen to go to the Tigers game a week ago Sunday with some friends. I think it's the only time I've ever gone to a Tiger game and they've won. It was a great game ending with a walk-off homer by Inge. Good game. Unfortunately I misapplied some suntan lotion and missed a few spots. I burnt the shit out of my upper forehead and my upper arms. I looked a bit like a splotchy Dr. Zoidberg. Luckily the burns were not in spots that rubbed up against clothing. I'm peeling now and much better, thanks for asking.

RIP-
Tommy Newsom - Tommy Newsom, Assistant Music Director on the Tonight Show under Johnny Carson's reign, passed away recently. Johnny jokingly dubbed the sax player "Mr. Excitement". I still remember one time that he made me laugh my ass off. Doc Severinsen (I met Doc Severinsen very briefly once...nice guy) was on a Carribean vacation (or other tropical vacation) and Tommy was sitting in for him as bandleader. Johnny asked Tommy where Doc was and he responded "Oh, he's probably honking on a conch". Well...it made me laugh, and I still remember it.

Tom Poston - Why is always the funny ones? Tom Poston, star of The Bob Newhart Show, Mork and Mindy, Newhart, and countless other guest roles passed away recently at the age of 86. Did you know that he was married to Suzanne Pleshette for the last 6 years? We'll miss you Tom...

I must be getting older...
A couple weeks ago at the restaurant job on of the newer, young bartenders asked what a Sidecar was. She had no idea. (Cognac, Cointreau, and lemon juice) She had never heard of it. She also wasn't sure what a Kir was (dry white wine, creme de cassis, and a lemon twist). Mind you, I have no flippin' idea how to make a Screaming Dead Nazi, a Slow Comfortable Screw Up Against a Wall with a Pillow, or any of the countless new "martini" recipes. Luckily I still do know how to make most of the "old school" drinks. Must come from my country club days. This new generation of younger bartenders may be able to make drinks that glow in the dark and taste like Sweet Tart farts, but I challenge them to make a Bullshot, a Pink Squirrel, a Golden Cadillac, a Rob Roy, a Stinger, a Grasshopper, or even a proper gin martini. I bet they don't know how to make a drink a Presbyterian (ginger ale and club soda). Deep sigh... Are these classics going to be forgotten? Give me a Singapore Sling and shut up!

(1 1/2 ounce gin
1/2 ounce Cherry Heering brandy
1/4 ounce Cointreau
1/4 ounce Benedictine
4 ounces pineapple juice
1/2 ounce lime juice
1/3 ounce grenadine
dash bitters
Shake all ingredients with ice and strain into a tall glass and garnish with a cherry and a pineapple slice. Enjoy!)

I neglected to mention that after the Tiger game my friends and I went to Slow's Barbeque on Michigan Ave. (near the original Tiger Stadium). I've eaten there several times and the food's always great and affordable. Where else can you get a pound of GREAT Texas-style BBQ brisket and two large sides for $11.95? Great food, great beer selection, and horrible service. It seems that any decent restaurant of the not super-posh type in Detroit tends to attract the swarthy Wayne State "too hip to bathe" student/band member types as servers. Service at spots such as Slow's, TJ's, Union Street, and the Majestic Cafe can downright suck. If you can't care enough to comb your hair or wash your smelly-ass taint-hugging jeans for work (in the freakin' service industry!), you may as well stay home and watch The Golden Girls and hit the hookah until you decide to go out later and order PBR because it's cool now and not tip your bartender well. Just sayin'... Sometimes I wonder if I should go back to waiting tables, but in Detroit. I could probably get a shitload of money for being a good waiter in town of hacks. People just don't expect good service downtown anymore (with exceptions of course)...

I had an idea for a new reality show. It would combine My Super Sweet 16 and Deadliest Catch. Throw some spoiled whiny teen bitches on a crab fishing boat in the Bering Sea and make them work the deck. If the whining persists throw them in the cages as bait or just throw them overboard. Promise them that Justin Timberlake or Davey Jones will show up to give them a new Land Rover or something to get them to show up. What do you think? Actually, most of the girls have probably already caught crabs...

Be sure to consult the Guide to Fart Etiquette...
A certain local elected official was in the store last week and apparently didn't check his surroundings. He didn't see me working at my computer about 10 feet away and he let one rip in the aisle. I crop dust the aisles all the time, but I'm sure to check the perimeter and then go to another aisle. Funny thing is though that you'd sort of expect him to fart by looking at him. He looks like the kind of guy that is as gassy as a group of people with lactose intolerance at an ice cream social. Nice guy. Don't get me wrong or nothin'... Farting can be fun, healthy, and educational when applied responsibly.

I made a pretty dang good curry the other day. I made an improvised curry with chicken pieces, curry powder, cumin, red curry paste, coconut milk, chicken stock, onions, garlic, green pepper, potatoes, cauliflower, mango, red lentils, and yellow split peas. I served it with some Basmati rice. Delicious! I made enough to last me the week probably. It's a little mild for my taste. The brand of curry paste that I used is definitely not as hot as the one I've used before. I dumped the whole jar in there and still no tears...

I finally saw The Last King of Scotland. It was good and Forest Whitaker certainly did an amazing job as Idi Amin, but overall I thought the film was a little disjointed. I actually think that his recurring role on ER last season was a better role. May I say that ER is actually really good this season? Entertainment Weekly agrees. They've really turned themselves around.

I know this is a little late but I'm glad that that Sanjaya guy is off American Idol. I don't even watch that retarded show, but I'm still glad he's off. That was just annoying.

Lost is getting interesting/confusing???

Have you seen Human Giant? Hilarious! But still not as funny as the current season of Reno 911! Best...season...ever!

I watched a great film the other day called Turtles Can Fly. It's an Iraqi/Iranian joint venture that takes place in northern Iraq near the Turkish border a couple weeks before Dubya decides to fuck everything up. It follows a group of kids in this village near a refugee camp. It's sad, poignant, hopeful, and beautifully shot. Definitely worth seeing, but you've got to be in the right frame of mind for it.

A friend of mine opened a bike shop this week. I haven't had a chance to visit yet but I hope to soon. I wish him the very best of luck. Everbody go buy a bike from him now!!!

I'm rambling a bit...probably time for bed.

Random Poll- What were some of your favorite childhood toys? (I really loved my Legos. Is it okay to still want to play with them as an adult?)

Random Poll #2- How do you like your eggs?

Random Poll #3- How ya diggin' this economy?

Random Poll #4- How would you bring about world peace (3 words or less)?

Random Poll #5- Would you rather be trapped in a room with Bill O'Reilly, Jack Jones (the singer), the rotting pustulent corpse of Rush Limbaugh, a hungry snaggle-toothed jackal, Linda Tripp, a shitload of mosquitos, or Fran Drescher? (You have no way of killing/deafening/blinding yourself or anyone in the room with you.)

ITMFA!

Cheers,
Jason

3 Comments:

Blogger Kathleen said...

Random Poll- What were some of your favorite childhood toys?
Hmm, I'm thinking you watched VH1's Best Toys Ever show the other day. I caught the top 10. I loved Tinker Toys. And yes, I think it's beyond acceptable to play with Legos as an adult.

Random Poll #2 - How do you like your eggs? - Your scrambled eggs are still the best ever...but it generally depends on my mood and what kind of bread product I have in the house.

Random Poll #3- How ya diggin' this economy?
Uh, not so much.

Random Poll #4- How would you bring about world peace (3 words or less)? Impeach the Jackass?

Random Poll #5- Would you rather be trapped in a room with Bill O'Reilly, Jack Jones (the singer), the rotting pustulent corpse of Rush Limbaugh, a hungry snaggle-toothed jackal, Linda Tripp, a shitload of mosquitos, or Fran Drescher?

I'm not sure I know who Jack Jones is, so I'm going with him as my answer. Although I think I could handle a conversation with Fran Drescher.

1:14 PM  
Blogger Glen said...

Random Poll- What were some of your favorite childhood toys? (I really loved my Legos. Is it okay to still want to play with them as an adult?) Jarts, my pellet gun and anything Nerf.

Random Poll #2- How do you like your eggs? Scrambled

Random Poll #3- How ya diggin' this economy? Diggin'....as in diggin' a hole.

Random Poll #4- How would you bring about world peace (3 words or less)? Free Love

Random Poll #5- Would you rather be trapped in a room with Bill O'Reilly, Jack Jones (the singer), the rotting pustulent corpse of Rush Limbaugh, a hungry snaggle-toothed jackal, Linda Tripp, a shitload of mosquitos, or Fran Drescher? (You have no way of killing/deafening/blinding yourself or anyone in the room with you.)
I'll have to take Fran and hope that I could keep her voice at a whisper level....

12:02 AM  
Blogger Serendipity Girl said...

Random Poll- What were some of your favorite childhood toys?
The Barbie who's hair I cut into a tasteful bob, Legos, and books

Random Poll #2 - How do you like your eggs?
Scrambled hard, and no one knows how to do it properly anymore

Random Poll #3- How ya diggin' this economy?
Not at all

Random Poll #4- How would you bring about world peace (3 words or less)?
Odor-free chlorine bleach

Random Poll #5- Would you rather be trapped in a room with Bill O'Reilly, Jack Jones (the singer), the rotting pustulent corpse of Rush Limbaugh, a hungry snaggle-toothed jackal, Linda Tripp, a shitload of mosquitos, or Fran Drescher?
Fran Drescher - I can fall asleep to her voice

1:31 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home