Friday, April 29, 2005

Rhymes with #^%$$%#^#&...

Not much going on. Work was absolutely asstastic today. Sometimes I think I'd prefer being a professional shit-shoveler. My job is challenging enough, but being severely understaffed makes it even grander. I do think about looking for another job, but the wine business is so rough right now at least I have the guarantee of salary and security. Still looking forward to Florida, although I got a partial itinerary and my required scheduled meetings look like they may be insanely boring.

FYI for those of you "locals"...Adray's is not moving to Allen Park. It's staying in Dearborn. I found out from the store-manager who stopped by at work today.

I usually hate watching local news, but I caught a segment on Channel 4 WDIV about High School Spring Break in Cancun. Michiganders/Detroiters are a drunken, whorish, doggish, pukingish, bedrugged, embarrassing lot. They'll drink and screw anthing (now I really regret not going anywhere for Spring Break) apparently. They strip and have sex anywhere. A local reporter went to Cancun with a hidden camera. Detroit teens are DIIIIIRTTTTTY! They weren't that dirty when I was in high school.

Looking forward to the return of Family Guy this Sunday. I'll be out with friends so I'll have to remember to tape it...

The geek in me is still looking forward to the last Star Wars film...

Another reason to pissed off at Dubya and the Department of Homeland Security...check this out. Not that you need another reason... I feel more threatened by the NRA, rednecks with Swastika tattoos, country music supertard Toby Keith, right-wing nut jobs, and other mouth-breathers than tree-huggers and Al Qaeda any day. God bless Amerikkka! Apparently Oklahoma City didn't count...

Joe Jackson and Todd Rundgren were on Conan tonight. They performed "While My Guitar Gently Weeps" together. Nice!!! I'd love to see their concert, but I can't make it...

I had to turn down free tickets with free valet to last Tuesday's Pistons playoff game because of work. Damn! I'm not the world's biggest sports fan, but I do like a general rule. I'll take free tickets to anything anytime. Damn job...

Did you see the Ramones documentary on PBS? Pretty f'in cool.

I got my T-shirt from WDET yesterday. I'm still waiting on my pledge premiums from WTVS...

Have you been watching the National Geographic's Strange Days on Planet Earth hosted by Edward Norton on PBS? You should be. Even if it's only because Edward Norton is hosting it. The basic gist is that humans have f'd up the planet. All of the world's fragile ecosystems have been drastically altered and the planet is going to the shitter. Surprise!!! Spraying Chanel No. 5 on a lump of shit isn't going to fix anthing...if you know what I mean. Check it out! Think globally and act locally before the domino effect kicks you in the ass...

There's this young guy that comes in the store occasionally to buy wine. I've nicknamed him "The Parmesan Kid". It seems that the only thing his wife makes is chicken parmesan or they order pizza. Every time he comes in he asks "What wine pairs with chicken parmesan/pizza?". He then decides not to take our advice and buy something on his own and then complain about it the next time he comes in. My coworker and I essentially draw straws to see who has to wait on him. He came in today and I drew the short straw. The space he takes up on this planet would be better utilized by a leaky medical waste receptacle.

Road construction in Michigan sucks!!! (For the record)


Thursday, April 28, 2005

Ya' perverted freaks!

I recently checked Sitemeter and discovered that about 20 people have discovered my blog within the last week or so by googling "Dr. Porkenheimer's Boner Juice". Nice...real nice. Another dozen or so have found my site be googling "La Shish IRS raid". Interesting. I'm going to throw out a challenge of sorts. I'm going to pick some completely random words and see how long it takes for some freak to google them...

"butt nugget leming spank fetish burrito Skeet Ulrich nipple fig pudding"

If anyone googles those words they should be immediately thrown in jail for being a threat to society. Or maybe they're my soulmate? Bring it on ya' freaks!


Gotta love the CBC...

I love the Candadian Broadcasting Corporation! I've stated it before. I just saw one of the most beautiful, vibrant, poignant films that I've ever seen...thanks to flipping channels. The film is called Little Cheung and it is brilliantly done. Check out this review for an explanation. Hunt it out and watch it and be sure to buy a fresh box of Kleenex.


Wednesday, April 27, 2005

I have Hooked on Phonics to thank...not

Your English Skills:

Grammar: 100%

Spelling: 100%

Vocabulary: 100%

Punctuation: 80%

A death knoll for Burgundy...

(If you regularly read my blog this post may bore you to's about wine and I need to vent...thanks for humoring me.)

Is Burgundy dead?

Hell yeah it is! Working in wine retail I've seen many trends in consumption come and go. The latest trends to be cheap crap and pinot noir. By cheap crap I mean mega-performers like Yellow Tail, Charles Shaw, and just about anything else with a bright label with an animal on it that tastes like sugared yak bile. Yellow Tail Shiraz is now the #1 selling 750ml red wine in the US, replacing Blackstone Merlot. Both of these wines, although not with technical flaw, are crap. They're not good. They're reminiscent of butt-coffee flavored with Jolly Ranchers. It's sad really. People apparently are willing to sacrifice quality for savings these days. It's somewhat understandable with the current state of the American economy and the general weakness of the once almighty American dollar in the world market.

The other current, somewhat flukish, trend is pinot noir. Although pinot noir has always had a steady following among vinuous types, the phenomonon of the film Sideways has had a strange impact on the sales of this elegant varietal. Luckily, this trend is starting to supplant the popularity of merlot (As you may or may not know...I'm not a big fan of merlot. In fact the only merlots that I tend to like are the expensive ones that taste like cabernet sauvignon. Why not buy a cab instead?). You may remember Miles' line "I am not fucking drinking merlot!" Well said! Sanford Winery in Santa Barbara is almost out of wine. Apparently there's nothing left to taste at the tasting room because of the popularity of the film (there was a scene filmed in the Sanford tasting room). Our Michigan distributor that sells Sanford is out of their pinots. Every other distributor (I buy from just over 20 distributors in all) is bringing in pinot noir samples every week hoping to hop a ride on the pinot train. It's a train that's building speed and I believe many are banking on it being the next juggernaut.

I've noticed a trend in Burgundy's absolutely dead. Burgundies, both red and white alike, used to be one of the benchmarks of wine for centuries. Our Burgundy sales are absofrickinlutely flat. It's not possible for the sales to be negative, but they may as well be. I don't know if this trend carries similarities elsewhere (worldwide), but I've read enough trade articles to believe that Burgundy sales are stagnant across the US. I don't know how much of this rings true in major markets like New York, San Francisco, and Chicago, but I'm sure sales are down.

This can be attributed to several factors...

Although Burgundy has been held in the highest regard by wine SNOBS everywhere, wine is luckily beginning to become commonplace among the masses, not just the prudish economic-elite bluebloods. Wine is becoming accessible and now it's even GOOD FOR YOU!

There is still a bit of anti-French sentiment in the US. This backlash is most noticeable in working class/blue collar/red state areas. Dearborn, Michigan is a pretty good cross-section. When Dubya first attacked Iraq, French wine sales plummetted en masse. They still have not fully recovered. Bordeaux, Rhone, Alsatian, Loire, and VDPs have slowly risen back to about 2/3 of their former numbers. I can hear the crickets chirping in the Burgundy section. The fact that the other regions have picked up leads me to believe that anti-French sentiment has had very little impact specifically on Burgundy.

The dollar is crap and the Euro is strong as a bull. People keep saying how strong the Euro is, when in reality, it's the American dollar that's dangerously weak. European wine prices are the highest they've ever been. Incredible value wines are coming out of Chile, Argentina, South Africa, Australia, and Spain. Although Spain obviously lies under jurisdiction of the Euro, there are lots of smaller up-and-coming wine regions that are producing some stellar wines at affordable prices. The increase in European wine prices is mostly noticeable in France and Italy. German prices are up a bit, but their sales have never measured up to the two power-houses.

Although Bordeaux prices are noticeably up, they're still roughly priced in unison with the quality of the vintage. Prices in Burgundy, not unlike Napa, just keep going up every year regardless of the quality of the vintage, in leaps and bounds, pricing themselves out of the market. This leaves the most collectible Burgundies to be scavenged by the uber-elite. However, the numbers of the uber-elite, have dwindled since the burst of the dotcom bubble. The economy is in the shitter and people aren't spending money like they used to. I believe that Burgundy's best hope in this area is the burgeoning of the Asian market. It's big and getting a lot bigger.

Burgundy's biggest problem is likely the quality/price ratio. Red Burgundy is made from pinot noir. Pinot noir is one of the world's most fickle grapes. Burgundy has been compared to a "mine-field". Great vintages are few and far between and when they are great they're likely to be priced out of reach. Producers like Domaine Romanee-Contee are the best example. is scarce...but it's out there. Would you pay over $1500.00 for ONE bottle of f'in pinot noir (Romanee-Conti) or $1000.00 for ONE bottle of chardonnay (Montrachet)? I certainly wouldn't...and I can't because I don't have that kind of money (I work in the wine business for chris'sake). I've never had a DRC wine and I probably never will. I have had opportunities to taste some great wines with friends and customers, but they don't buy Burgundy. You can get a GREAT pinot noir from California or Oregon for less than $50.00 a bottle. Often better than a French counterpart for 10 times the price.

I'm the first to admit that I'm not the world's biggest fan of pinot noir, chardonnay, and Burgundy in general. I respect them, but I generally would prefer to drink something else. I will admit that a good white Burgundy can be astounding, and I'd rather drink a white Burgundy over a red any day. They can be great! However, I'm still waiting to taste one of those "life-changing" Burgundies that everyone is talking about. I've been with groups of people that were opening that "very special old Burgundy" expecting them to behold and bow down to the world's greatest wine...only to be disappointed beyond belief. "Hmmm...maybe I aged it too long." No shit!!! Did you actually believe that a 30 year old Pommard or Gevrey-Chamberting would maintain a deep color and be laden with gobs of upfront fruit? No!!! It's going to be brown, dead, and generally ass-nasty bad.

I have personally not purchased a bottle of Burgundy in about 6 or 7 years. I have opportunity to taste them and none of them strike a chord. The ones that I may like are probably over $100.00. I'd sooner buy a Carneros chardonnay or a Willamette Valley pinot noir any day. Carneros and the Russian River Valley in California and the Willamette Valley in Oregon have long been established as reliable regions for growing pinot noir. Santa Barbara and Mendocino are hot on their tail. The key word is "reliable". California and Oregon Pinots are much more reliable than red Burgundies. Weather is the most important factor followed by modern winemaking skills and technology. The weather in Burgundy is much less predictable and many of the winemakers are not willing to embrace 20th century thinking (yes...I do realize that this is the 21st century). California and Oregon pinots are consistently outperforming red Burgundies in blind-tastings. Even the French are picking American winners in blind-tastings. The world, like Robert Parker, although they may not admit it, want rich fruit-filled wines that are delicious NOW. Burgundy better wake up and come to its senses.

Burgundy is no longer the jewel in the crown. If Burgundy is ever going to survive and perform as well as it used to in the world wine market it's got to embrace change. This means lowering prices, embracing technology, better marketing, and lowering the "snob appeal" of Burgundy. Perhaps, most importantly, they can accept the world trend of wines that are fresh, fruit-filled, and TASTE GOOD. If they have to uproot and move further south (out of Burgundy) or even to California or Oregon to make better wines maybe they should. "In Vino Veritas"..."In wine there is truth"

Wine speaks for itself. Burgundy had better start playing the same game everyone else is or they may as well give up. Producers like Vision Cellars, Siduri, Roessler, Argyle, Mendelsohn, Saintsbury, Panther Creek, Consilience, and many others are making great pinot. Catch up, Burgundy, or you're screwed! The coffin is ready to be nailed shut...


Monday, April 25, 2005

My Taste in Music (Tastes Like Chicken)...

Your Taste in Music:

80's Alternative: Highest Influence
80's Pop: Highest Influence
90's Alternative: Highest Influence
Punk: Highest Influence
Heavy Metal: Medium Influence
Progressive Rock: Medium Influence
Ska: Medium Influence
80's R&B: Low Influence
80's Rock: Low Influence
90's Pop: Low Influence
90's R&B: Low Influence
Adult Alternative: Low Influence
Classic Rock: Low Influence
Dance: Low Influence
Old School Hip Hop: Low Influence

Sunday, April 24, 2005

The 15 best wines I've ever had...

I was thinking about some of the great wines I've had and figured I'd try to compile some sort of here's the best 15 wines I've ever had (in no particular order)...

Chamber's Rosewood Vineyards Rutherglen Rare Muscadelle (Tokay) NV
1995 Chateau Tirecul "La Madame" Monbazillac (France) (Better than d'Yquem!)
1990 Chateau Montrose (St. Estephe, Bordeaux) (consumed last summer)
1978 Diamond Creek Volcanic Hill Cabernet Sauvignon (Napa) (consumed about 2 years ago)
2001 Domaine Zind Humbrecht Riesling "Brand" (Alsace, France)
2001 Marquis Philips Integrity Shiraz (McLaren Vale, South Australia)
A 1976 Franken Beerenauslese that I had at a friend's house, but I don't remember the details.
1976 Bollinger RD Champagne Extra Brut (consumed about 5 years ago, disgorged about 7 years ago)
1998 d'Arenberg "The Ironstone Pressings" (Grenache/Shiraz/Mourvedre blend) (McLaren Vale, South Australia)
Dutschke "The Tawny" 22 Year Old NV (Port) (South Australia)
1977 Smith Woodhouse Vintage Port (consumed about 3 years ago)
2001 Ramey Jericho Canyon Red (Napa)
1997 Gallo of Sonoma Estate Cabernet Sauvignon (Sonoma)
2001 Shirvington Shiraz (McLaren Vale, South Australia)
2001 Hobbs Shiraz (Barossa Valley, South Australia)


A whole lotta bubkus...

Here's some snore-inducing crap for ya...

I was flipping channels tonight and noticed...

...Tracy Chapman on Austin City Limits. She has shoes now. Good for you Tracy! She sounded great!

...that Americans must be really stupid if they have to put English subtitles on the screen when people are speaking English. This typically happens when Brits, Australians, Ugandans, or Appalachian folk are speaking.

...that I still love Globe Trekker on PBS. Today part-time host Megan McCormick was in Egypt. She traveled around quite a bit including the obvious pyramids...but the coolest thing is when she took a hot air balloon and flew over the Valley of Kings. It was stunning! I couldn't even imagine how great it would be to see Giza, Luxor, and Abu Simbel in person. I am so jealous of my friend Kathleen who's been to Egypt.

...that NASCAR sucks...especially when it pre-empts MAD TV. Actually I've known that NASCAR sucks for some time now. It's sucked since its conception...that fateful day when a be-mulleted inbred Cro Magnon with body lice and the stench of wet fart got his manhood stuck in a bottle of Pabst Blue Ribbon while watching his mama get it on with his brother/father/uncle/dog while the tires on their home were being rotated. Please folks...stop peeing in the gene-pool!!!

...that Horatio Sanz is still un-funny.

In other news...

Looking forward to my business trip to Florida.

I was screwing around in the kitchen tonight and made a pretty kick-ass Indian style dish with chicken, potato, sweet potato, red pepper, onion, ginger, green onion, fresh mango, pineapple, bean sprouts, carrot, purple cabbage, fresh hot pepper, OJ, vegetable stock, soy nuts, almonds, and Dopiaza sauce. I put it over some jasmine rice and it was pretty damn awesome. Spicy enough, but not enough to make you cry. I should enough to last all week.

I was flipping through my new Entertainment Weekly and saw an ad for something deeply disturbing. Rosie O'Donnell and Andie McDowell are going to star in a "Hallmark Hall of Fame" presentation of Riding the Bus with My Sister on CBS. Rosie plays someone with "special needs". The picture makes it look so saccharine sweet that I may vomit through my nose. I'm sure that Ms. (Mrs.?) O'Donnell will find it a real stretch to play a character that is socially awkward and stared at by little children ("Mommy...I thought that you said there was no such thing as monsters..."). I'm trying to be as PC as possible...I have absolutely nothing against special needs people or lesbians...just Rosie O'Donnell.

No one interviewed seems to be too happy with the new choice of pope. What?!? Do they have a problem with the Inquisition?

This is's late was 83 degrees last snowed today. Yup...this is Michigan...the state that looks like a mitten, has the shittiest roads anywhere, and votes "blue", yet still votes down the gay-marriage proposition. Michigan isn't supposed to make sense.

One of my Detroin Lions (Defensive End) came in this week to buy some wine. He's the nicest guy you could ever meet and he can crush you between his thumb and forefinger. He likes some nice reds and he's liked my choices for him thus far. He said that he'd get me a pair of tickets to any single game I want next season except for Thanksgiving. Awesome!!! I think it's kind of funny, but very cool that three of the biggest, toughest defensivemen from the Lions get together and drink wine. Imagine it...if you will.

Hmmm...that's enough useless shite for now...


Saturday, April 23, 2005

That's funny...where's Detroit?


American Cities That Best Fit You:

70% San Francisco

65% Los Angeles

60% Washington, DC

55% Atlanta

55% Chicago

Friday, April 22, 2005

Dusk approaching Kalangadoo...

The View in Kalangadoo... Posted by Hello

I've finally been able to replace my profile picture with a picture actually taken at Kalangadoo House. The picture of the sun setting over the Sydney skyline from the harbor was beautiful, but this picture is more's Kalangadoo.


The Palace Hotel in Broken Hill

Me and travel companions in front of the Palace Hotel, Broken Hill, NSW, Australia Posted by Hello

This picture was taken Thursday, October 9, 2003. The Palace Hotel is where they filmed part of The Adventures of Priscilla Queen of the Desert including the infamous bar scene (not the ping pong ball scene).


The Australian Magpie and its glorious song...

Australian Magpie Posted by Hello

This somewhat plain looking bird has one of the most beautiful calls you've ever heard. Imagine dozens and dozens of them at the same time.


Adelaide by air...

Adelaide, Australia by air Posted by Hello

I don't have a digital camera, so I have to rely on other people's digital pics to post from my Australia trip. Now that I've got a new computer I feel a little more adventurous in trying to post more pics. This picture is from Eric. This picture is from October, 2003


I need to get out more...

Your Travel Profile:

You Are Well Traveled in the Midwestern United States (50%)

You Are Well Traveled in the Northeastern United States (43%)

You Are Well Traveled in the Western United States (42%)

You Are Somewhat Well Traveled in Australia (38%)

You Are Somewhat Well Traveled in Western Europe (21%)

You Are Untraveled in Africa (0%)

You Are Untraveled in Asia (0%)

You Are Untraveled in Canada (0%)

You Are Untraveled in Eastern Europe (0%)

You Are Untraveled in Latin America (0%)

You Are Untraveled in New Zealand (0%)

You Are Untraveled in Scandinavia (0%)

You Are Untraveled in Southern Europe (0%)

You Are Untraveled in the Middle East (0%)

You Are Untraveled in the Southern United States (0%)

You Are Untraveled in the United Kingdom (0%)

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Drivel and brain-droppings...

Work really sucked rhino balls today...SURPRISE!!! Actually, our server went down for the vast majority of the day. This leaves me behind on a lot of computer work. I'll have to try to catch up on all of that tomorrow in addition to tomorrow's work. Oy!

I went online to check out the hotel I'm going to be staying at in Florida and I must say it looks pretty swanky... I've really never been anywhere warm know...with palm trees and such. While I was in Sydney I was there during Spring when it was cool and sunny. I did see palm trees there and also in southern Switzerland. I guess I've never been anywhere tropical-like. Come to think of it I did see some palm trees in Sacramento... I was thinking of venturing out in the Miami area, but I might not with a beach like that at my disposal... I grew up in Oregon and I'd been to the coast numerous times, but I only remember the sun being out twice (one of those times was in Brookings near the California border). This should be a nice change-up. I hope there's a breeze...

I'm really looking forward to my vacation this July with friends...I really just need to veg out and "out-lazy a Teamster" as Homer Simpson once put it.

I watched two great back-to-back specials on PBS tonight about "Alien Invasion" (introduction of new species of plants and animals to a new environment and the dangerous affect they have on it) and global warming...both hosted by Edward Norton. Another great performance from one of America's best all-time actors. Very interesting stuff...

I'm still waiting to hear more details on the La Shish IRS raid...
I guess I'll have a fresh-squeezed orange juice, a small fattoush, and mjadara while I'm waiting...and some more bread...with garlic sauce...EXTRA GARLIC SAUCE PLEASE!!!

My friend's sister got some nice press in both Real Detroit Weekly and the Metro Times this week. Way to go Loretta Lucas!!!

Ira Glass from NPR's "This American Life" will be performing in Ann Arbor this December. Tickets go on sale Saturday?!?!? Isn't that a little early? I'd love to go, but I don't want to commit to tickets this early.

I was offered two tickets to the John Scofield Trio/Brad Mehldau Trio double-bill tomorrow and I can't go. I called up my jazz-head friends and none of them can go either. It's a damn shame. Brad Mehldau is best new pianist I've heard in years. Benny Green is pretty awesome, but he's not as experimental...

I've noticed lately that a lot of acts are playing at the Masonic. I haven't seen anything at the Masonic since a production of the "Phantom of the Opera" about 12 or so years ago...and a production of "The Magic Flute" about 15 years ago. It's a nice venue and I'm glad to see it being utilized.

I also just read that the Undertones are coming...and the New York Dolls (separately)! What's up with the sudden influx of good shows? It's like it was 12 years ago. There seems to have been a long dry patch of good shows lately. There's always a good show here and there, but they never seem to accumulate...

So far Patrick Duffy is winning the "coolest" 1 vote (literally). Let's hear from you...


My life path number...whatever that is...

Your Life Path Number Is 6


You have a strong sense of responsibility: you must feel useful to be happy.

The main contribution you make is that of advice, service and ever present support.

This is the Life Path related to leadership by example and assumption of responsibility...

Thus, it is your obligation to pick up the burden and always be ready to help.

The Life Path 6 is one who is compelled to function with strength and compassion.

You are a sympathetic and kind person, generous with personal and material resources.

Wisdom, balance, and understanding are the cornerstones of your Life Path.

Your extraordinary wisdom and the ability to understand the problems of others is apt to commence from an early age...

As a child, you easily spanned the generation gap and assumed an important role in life early on.

While you may assume huge responsibilities in the community, you life revolves around the immediate home and family.

Most with Life Path 6 are the positive types who willingly carry far more than their fair share of the load and are always there when needed.

You are very human and realistic about life, and you feel that the most important thing in your life is the home, family and friends.

The number 6 Life Path actually produces few negative examples, but there are some pitfalls peculiar to the path.

Avoid a tendency to become overwhelmed by responsibilities and a slave to others.

Also, avoid being too critical (of yourself or of others).

The misuse of this Life Path produces tendencies towards exaggeration, over-expansiveness, and self-righteousness.

Imposing one's views in an interfering or meddling way must be an issue of concern.

The natural burdens of your number are heavy, and on rare occasions, responsibility is abdicated by persons with this Life Path 6.

This rejection of responsibility will make you feel very guilty and uneasy, and it will have very damaging effects upon your relationships with others.

Apparently I shouldn't have been born in September...

Your True Birth Month Is January




Easily jealous

Loves children

Rather reserved

Highly attentive

Likes to criticize

Needs close friends

Ambitious and serious

Smart, neat and organized

Hardworking and productive

Loves to teach and be taught

Quiet unless excited or tensed

Sensitive and has deep thoughts

Knows how to make others happy

Searches for the greatest romance

Resistant to illnesses but prone to colds

Romantic but has difficulties expressing love

Always looking at people's flaws and weaknesses

Sprechen Sie English?

Your Linguistic Profile:

60% General American English

15% Upper Midwestern

10% Dixie

10% Yankee

5% Midwestern

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Lions, and tigers, and stolen surveys...OH MY!!!

01. What is the geekiest part of your music collection?
Cyndi Lauper, but I'll defend it to the bitter end.
02. What do you eat when you raid the fridge late at night?
Leftovers...or maybe I'll throw a tortilla with cheese in the microwave
03. What is your secret guaranteed weeping movie?
Once Were Warriors (during Grace's funeral
04. If you could have plastic surgery, what would you have done?
Reduction of my man-boobs
05. Do you have a completely irrational fear?
06. What is the little physical habit that gives away your insecure moment?
Don't know...I might stutter a bit...
07. Are you a pyromaniac?
No, but I love playing with campfires
08. Do you have too many love interests? would be great
09. Do you know anyone famous?
Although I've actually met LOTS of celebrities, I don't really know one though...okay, I lied...I know a few of the Detroit Lions, Bill Ford Jr., and an internationally know "prophet"
10. Describe your bed:
It's pretty boring, actually.
11. Spontaneous or plain?
Chocolate/vanilla swirl
12. Who should play you in a movie about your life?
Chris Farley if he wasn't dead...maybe Andy Richter...or Chris Rock (kidding)
13. Do you know how to play poker?
14. What do you carry with you at all times?
Wallet, comb, keys, Zippo, and a business card holder
15. What do you miss most about being little?
Summer vacation before the legal working age
16. Are you happy with your given name?
It's okay
17. How much money would it take to get you to give up the Internet for one year?
More than I have...
18. What colour is your bedroom?
19. What was the last song you were listening to?
King Kong Kitchee Ki-Mi-O - Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds
20. Have you ever been in a play?
4 times...once as lead (middle school and high school)
21. Have you ever been in love?
22. Do you talk a lot?
23. Do you like yourself and believe in yourself?
"I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and gosh darnit...people like me"
I like myself enough...
24. Do transient, homeless, or starving people sometimes annoy you?
Only the "cracked out" ones waiting for you in a parking lot anywhere in the city of Detroit.
25. Do you consider yourself to be a nice person?
26. Do you spend more time with your girlfriend/boyfriend or your friends?
I'll let you know as soon as I get a girlfriend...
27. What is your ideal marriage location?
Kalangadoo would be fantastic, but anywhere will do as long as I've found my true love
28. Which musical instrument do you wish you could play?
29. Favourite fabric?
Cotton...the fabric of our lives
30. Something you love and hate?
Working in the wine business
31. What kind of bedding do you use?
Whatever I bought at JC Penney...I think it's Egyptian cotton
32. Do you tell your friends about your sex life?
Maybe if I had one.
33. What's the one language you want to learn?
Japanese (or re-learn German)
34. How do you eat an apple?
The regular way???
35. What do you order at a bar?
One of each
36. Have you ever pierced your body parts?
Just one ear...long closed up
37. Do you have tattoos?
One ("Swamp Thing" from the the Chameleons "Strange Times" album cover)
38. Would you ever admit to having done plastic surgery any kind if confronted?
39. What's one of the "funniest" things you've ever done?
Dunno...ask my friends...
40. Do you drive stick?
Not at the moment
41. What's one trait you hate in a person?
There's a lot of things I hate about people...ignorance
42. What kind of watch(es) do you wear?
Swiss Army and my grandfather's IWC (International Watch Company)
43. Most frivolous purchase?
A factory re-conditioned ice cream maker (online). It works great!
44. Do you consider yourself materialistic?
45. What do you cook the best?
Not to toot my own horn, but I'm a pretty good cook...I'm a darn good braiser.
46. Favourite writing instrument?
Any fine-point black ink gel pen that clicks
47. Do you prefer to stand out or blend in?
48. Would you ever go out dressed like the opposite sex?
Maybe for Halloween
49. What's one car you will never buy?
A Hummer.
50. What kind of books do you like to read?
Chef autobiographies, kitchen tales, political humor...
51. If you won the lottery, what would you do?
Buy myself a house and houses for my friends and family (depending on how big the winnings are), stop working, travel the world, and give to charity.
52. Burial or cremation?
Cremation. Ashes spread in Kalangadoo and the Rigi (Switzerland)
53. How many online journals do you read regularly?
About 7
54. What's one thing you're a sore loser at?
55. If you don't like a person, how do you show it?
I ignore them as much as possible.
56. Do you cry in front of friends?
I would if I had something to cry about. I've cried at movies in front of friends before.
57. What kind of first impression do you think you give to people?
Nice guy.
58. What's one thing you like to do alone?
Masturbate. Duh!!!
59. Are you a giver or a taker?
Giver...I hope
60. When's the last time you cried?
A light cry two days ago at the end of Millions (movie)
61. Favourite communication method?
Email for effectiveness, but a phone for conversation
62. How many drinks before you're tipsy?
Keep going...
63. Do you think you're cute?
Only in a teddy bearish kind of way
64. Do you have problems changing clothes in front of friends?
Dunno...I don't generally do it
65. What's the most painful experience you've ever had?
My Swiss grandfather dying. Also, moving around a lot as a kid.


Not much going on...

Apparently my trip to Florida is on. I booked a flight today. The French company hosting me will reimburse my flight and my hotel room is already taken care of. I guess I'm staying at the Embassy Suites Deerfield Beach. I'll be flying in to Ft. Lauderdale Airport and then shuttled to the hotel. The trade show is taking place at the same hotel. Sounds alright. Let's hope it doesn't suck balls.

Local favorite Middle Eastern restaurant chain La Shish's HQ was raided by about 40 IRS officers today. Uh oh. The owner and his son are under investigation (the son is still under investigation for murder as well). I eat at La Shish a lot. It's pretty damn good, but it still doesn't stand up to most of the joints on Warren or anything in the Schaeffer vicinity. Al-Ameer is still probably my fave. For any non-friends reading this...Dearborn, Michigan has the largest Arabic population outside of the Middle East and for this I am very thankful. The food is AWESOME and pretty damn HEALTHY! I've had Arabic food outside of Michigan before and IT DOES NOT STAND UP. One of the benefits (few) of living in Dearborn.

Holy crap! "Cliff" from Cheers is the new pope! Oh...wait...Joseph Ratzinger, not John Ratzenberger. My bad. I'm not Catholic so it really doesn't affect me, but I'm not too happy with the choice. Apparently he's been labeled the "Panzer Cardinal". I guess he belongs to the extreme far right of the church and had been appointed Guardian of Doctrine by JP the Deuce in 1981. Apparently he is adamently against gay marriage and other such "progessive" movements. Too bad. He was a member of the Hitler Youth when he was young (not by choice, it was mandatory), let's just hope that none of Hitler's doctrine rubbed off on him. Pope Benedict XVI is only 78 years old. Mmmmmmmmm...Eggs Benedict...mmmmmmmmm...

Have you seen Wonder Showzen on MTV2?
VERY, VERY wrong and VERY, VERY funny.

I watched House tonight...still the best show on TV right now as far as I'm concerned...

Gang of Four, Kraftwerk, and Robyn Hitchcock are all coming to Detroit in the near future...I think I just wet myself. I pray for the day that Tom Waits will come to town...the day that will never happen.

I was offered two free tickets to the Brad Mehldau Trio/John Scofield Trio double-bill in Ann Arbor on Thursday and I can't go. That REALLY sucks!!!

The geek in me is starting to look forward to the last Star Wars flick...
It better not suck like the Phantom Menace. far so good, althought I'd love an NC-17 version. Let's hope it doesn't stink like a milk-fart. I can't believe that I sold all of my action-figures and trading cards at a garage sale many moons ago. I'm a dumb-ass.

It's been a weird, warm April after a long-ass white winter. It's supposed to get colder tomorrow. I hope so. I can't take this perfect summer-like weather much longer.

Random poll- Who is "coolest"? Pope Benedict XVI, Condaleeza Rice, Patrick Duffy, or a turnip?


Monday, April 18, 2005


Not much to report...

I thought it was kind of interesting last week when I was flipping through channels and Michael Jackson was not billed as "International Pop Superstar" or "World Pop Sensation", but "Accused Child Molester".

Diggin' my new computer and my new super-fast cable/wireless hookup!

Diggin' my new Blundstone Boots! All the winemakers in Australia wear them...

Waiting for my minimalist tax refunds...

Really loving the new John Doe album...

Saw Millions last night... Great f'in movie! It's directed by Danny Boyle (Trainspotting and 28 Days Later), but it's a kid's movie. It's sweet, hopeful, clever, and poignant. Well done!

Did not see Mondovino as I had planned...

Apparently I'm going to Boca Raton, Florida for a long weekend in May for a big wine show. The store owner can't go so I'm getting sloppy seconds. Hotel, airfare, two meals, extra travel expenses...FREE!!! The costs are being covered by some French company. I guess it's a big show of European wineries looking for importers. I'm going to taste lots of wine and make recommendations to any of the approximately 20 distributors that I deal with. Not bad. I've never been to Florida and I've never had any major desire as I hate heat, humidity, and bugs. But I'll take a free trip any day. I've got to get a hold of a woman in France to finalize transportation/hotel arrangements tomorrow. My evenings are free so hopefully I can have some fun. There are usually lots of wine and dine opportunities during these big trade shows. Do I go for the free dinners or venture out on my own and pay??? A Cuban sandwich in Miami sounds good. Should I get a rental car or use cabs???We'll see.

The History Channel was showing Band of Brothers last week. I watched it every night. I do own the DVD set, but it's like crack...when you start watching you're hooked. Great, great, great mini-series!


Two borrowed borrowed surveys...

*If I were a month, I'd be: September

*If I were a day of the week, I'd be: Sunday

*If I were a time of day, I'd be: 2:00AM

*If I were a planet, I'd be: Neptune

*If I were a sea animal, I'd be: whale shark

*If I were a direction, I'd be: North West

*If I were a piece of furniture, I'd be: a teak Danish Modern endtable (or a beanbag chair)

*If I were a sin, I'd be: sloth

*If I were a historical figure, I'd be: dead

*If I were a liquid, I'd be: shiraz

*If I were a tree, I'd be: a redgum eucylptus

*If I were a bird, I'd be: pooping on your car

*If I were a flower, I'd be: an iris

*If I were a kind of weather, I'd be: overcast and drizzly with a chance of sun

*If I were a mythical creature, I'd be: a griffin

*If I were a musical instrument, I'd be: a stand-up bass

*If I were an animal, I'd be: a wallaby

*If I were a colour, I'd be: black

*If I were an emotion, I'd be: concerned

*If I were a vegetable, I'd be: jicama

*If I were a sound, I'd be: guitar feedback

*If I were an element, I'd be: air or mercury (depends on which way you look at it)

*If I were a car, I'd be: a 1980 Plymouth Volare Premiere Edition with a Slant-6

*If I were a song, I'd be: "Let's Get Drunk and Screw"...but seriously, "You Can't Always Get What You Want" - Rolling Stones

*If I were a movie, I'd be: Tampopo

*If I were a food, I'd be: a slow roasted pork loin

*If I were a place, I'd be: Kalangadoo, naturally

*If I were a material, I'd be: denim (tough, but soft and comforting)

*If I were a taste, I'd be: creamsicle

*If I were a scent, I'd be: summer rain

*If I were a religion, I'd be: thinking about changing identities

*If I were a word, I'd be: subtle

*If I were an object, I'd be: a mirror

*If I were a body part, I'd be: a nose

*If I were a facial expression, I'd be: puzzled

*If I were a subject in school, I'd be: geography

*If I were a cartoon character, I'd be: A hybrid of Charlie Brown and Bill the Cat

*If I were a shape, I'd be: a rhombus

*If I were a number, I'd be: 9

Survey #2

Last Cigarette: Don't smoke
Last Alcoholic Drink: Last night, draft Newcastle
Last Car Ride: Tonight when I drove home from work
Last Kiss: Ouch! About 4 years. Thanks...thanks for asking.
Last Good Cry: I don't remember the last "good cry" (maybe 15 years), but I teared up a little last night at the end of the film Millions
Last Library Book: Many many moons ago.
Last book bought: "La Technique" by Jacques Pepin-used (Out of Print)
Last Book Read: "Partly Cloudy Patriot" by Sarah Vowell
Last Movie Seen in Theatres: Millions last night
Last Movie Rented: "The Man Who Fell to Earth" about 4 years ago (I don't currently have a membership anywhere)
Last Cuss Word Uttered: f*ck
Last Beverage Drank: Guernsey Dairy Skim Milk
Last Food Consumed: Leftover homemade linguini aglio olio w/bacon
Last Crush: Currently...can't say
Last Phone Call: A call at work from a clinically insane person (my boss)
Last TV Show Watched: "The Daily Show" is on right now
Last Time Showered: this morning
Last Shoes Worn: My black "Blunnies". My new Blundstone boots made in Tasmania. They rule! My Carolina Boot Company combat boots are wearing out.
Last CD Played: The new John Doe..."Forever Hasn't Happened Yet"...Awesome!!!
Last Item Bought: Gallon of milk and chocolate at work.
Last Download: Opened an e-mail with an attachment
Last Annoyance:
Last Disappointment:
Last Soda Drank: Coke
Last Thing Written: I took a phone message for someone before leaving work.
Last Key Used: Car key
Last Words Spoken: Yes (I'll move my car)
Last Sleep: last night
Last Ice Cream Eaten: I won't count the shitty ice cream I had yesterday, so I'll say sweet cream with caramel, chocolate chips, and pecans at Coldstone Creamery last week
Last Chair Sat In: Home computer chair right now.
Last Webpage Visited:

Sunday, April 17, 2005

Australia: Day Four

...and the saga continues...

Friday, October 10, 2003
(Lots of links here folks. Be sure to check out as many as possible.)

I woke up after the first real sleep I'd had so far on this trip. My bed at the Adelaide Hilton may very well be the most comfortable in the world. It was unbelievably welcoming. Although I probably only got about 6 hours sleep it was perhaps the most rewarding and restful sleep of all time. I was in frickin' Australia on the top floor of the Hilton overlooking Adelaide with the ocean in the background. What could be better? My room windows were cranked open and the breeze was absolutely marvelous. What a glorious day! It was slightly overcast, but an absolutely beautiful day. We had to meet in the hotel lobby at 8:00AM. I was up with plenty of time and decided to get a jump on the day. This was the perfect opportunity to get some laundry done seeing as I still had another night. I didn't know if I'd have a chance to do laundry, so once I figured out that it was indeed possible I jumped at the chance to pay way too much for someone to wash and fold my boxers and other dainties. I took a glorious shower in the world's best shower, got dressed, and sprang out the hotel entrance to address the world.

There was a greenspace across from the hotel where there were parked a few "Road Trains". Awesome! Road trains are the mega trucks (triples and quadruples and such) that you see in all the Aussie movies. Apparently there was some sort of trucking convention at the hotel. Cool! I walked around the immediate area of the hotel and then returned to the Adelaide Central Market. It was early but it was already hoppin'. I found a friendly looking booth and ordered a meatpie and a double short black (espresso). Good meatpie, great frickin' coffee! They really know how to make great coffee in Australia! I then found a baker's stall and ordered a small crusty sourdough loaf, and two still-warm croissants (one chocolate). Damn!!! I've never had a croissant so fresh or so fabulous. I don't want to sound like a possessed foodie, but I found Australian dairy to be far superior to just about anything I've had. This includes the butter that went into my skullf'in good croissants. I saved the sourdough loaf for the day ahead. I enjoyed the sights, smells, and sounds of the Central Market for a while and then returned to hotel to meet my comrades in vino. Jan, fearless president of the Australian Wine Bureau, had business to attend to and would not be joining us. We were to split into two groups this day to explore the McLaren Vale (my favorite Aussie wine region). Philippa would take Shayn, Eric, Brittney, Nichole, and Tim with her in Group 1. I would be traveling with Sarah, Trudy, Jordan, and Nathan. We got into our respective SUV's and met our drivers. We had the most fantastic driver of all time. Her name is Karen. She was one of the greatest parts of the trip for me. She's kind, funny, ballsy, and all in all just an amazingly great person.

One of our companions was not feeling too well from the night before (we have been drinking non-stop for Chrissakes). We stopped a drug store to pick up some Berocca. Berocca are these amazing effervescent orange-flavored tablets that you drop in water and drink like Alka Seltzer. Berocca, however, contain a megadose of vitamins and other goodies. They are highly recommended for hangovers or just to start your day off with a boost. They're hugely popular in Australia. They even taste good. As far as I can tell they're illegal in this country. Damn! Anyhoo...Karen began to drive us to our first winery of the day. We arrived at Hugo Wines on Elliot Flat Road in the gorgeous McLaren Vale. We were greeted by proprietor John Hugo. He was very kind and down to earth (typically Australian). We tasted through his wines and he also gave us a ride through and around his property. We stopped near the top of a hill and took in the glorious valley. It was stunning. No one in our group but me had seen a kangaroo in the wild yet. Some asked if there are any kangaroos in the area and he replied that there are tons of them...just not for us to see apparently. The kangaroos are very good at playing hide and seek from humans. We also had our introduction to "Patterson's Curse" or "Salvation Jane". Patterson's Curse is a beautiful purple flowering weed that is taking over much of the vineyard land in South Australia. It's gorgeous to look at, but a giant headache for winemakers. We returned to Hugo Wines' Cellar Door and took a good look at some of the vines. There were some glorious old bush vines that had to be pushing at least 50 years. We bid farewell to John Hugo and his wife and Karen drove us to our next destination...Kangarilla Road Winery.

Kangarilla Road Winery is a nice little gem in the McLaren Vale. Our tour was less hands on, but a simple tasting. The property is gorgeous and the blooming spring flowers were a sight to behold. Kangarilla Road is one of the very few Australian wineries that has an notable quantity of zinfandel planted. They make two zins and they're both good, but the McLaren Vale is utterly fantastic! Most wineries have a dog, but Kangarilla Road has a bunch of the friendliest canines you'll ever encounter. There was a very excitable large puppy in the tasting room with us. If anything, at least stop by the winery to pet the dogs. ;) They're great!

We were moving ahead of schedule so the fabulous Karen drove us to Wirra Wirra Winery. Wirra Wirra was not in our schedule but we stopped by to taste anyway. Our other group had already been there earlier. Karen had mentioned that it was one of her favorite wineries. We entered the Cellar Door (Tasting Room) and sampled all of their wines plus a selection of some fantastic local cheeses and charcuterie. Good stuff. I bought a couple bottles for Karen and presented them to her as a "thank you" gift for hauling our misfit asses around.

Our next stop was d'Arenberg Winery. I was excited. I think that d'Arenberg is one of the greatest wineries in Australia if not the world. I had previously met winemaker Chester Osborn in Michigan a few years ago (on his birthday coincidentally). Chester's an awesome guy and even a greater winemaker. We arrived at the winery and it was beautiful, as expected. The experience, unfortunately, was somewhat of a letdown. We were seated for lunch by the dining room manager and met a representative of the McLaren Vale wine district. The manager seemed a little "put out" and acted snobbishly as if he were thinking "Who are these young kids getting a free lunch?". The lunch was great (off the menu). I think I had lamb chops. The experience was fine, but perhaps it bugged us because everyone else we had encountered was so entirely welcoming and gracious. We moved over to the tasting room and tasted through several fantastic wines. Unfortunately neither Chester or his dad d'Arry were at the winery that day. They were in Adelaide for the "Taste" festivities. I think our experience would have been better if either of them were there. But at least I got to visit one of my favorite wineries.

We again had some extra time and since Shirvington Winery wouldn't see us (Karen called for us, but they told us they were too small and not to visit) we ventured to Kay Brothers Amery Vineyards. Shirvington Shiraz is one of my favorite wines, but they're very small and cultish. It's almost like an "Area 51 of Wine". We had no appointment for Kay Brothers Amery Vineyards, but we took our chances. The setting was breathtaking. The Cellar Door is perched atop a small hill. I took some beautiful pictures here. I was able to get a few pictures of the vineyards with Salvation Jane, cows, and a frickin' RAINBOW in the background. How sweet is that? We stepped inside the Cellar Door and none other than General Manager Colin Rayment was there to pour for us. He was most accomidating, friendly, and down to earth (as you'll find with most Australians). The wines were INSANELY good! I love selling them in the store because the wines are so damn good, but I also had a great experience. The winery is moderately obscure, but cultish to those in the know. Australian winemakers are some of the most humble people you'll ever meet. You may have tasted the best wine you've ever had in your life and you tell the winemaker and they simply respond "No worries." They work hard and take pride in their work, but they never flaunt it or show ego. Colin is one of these great souls.

Our next stop was Yangarra Park Winery. Karen had a good map, but had some difficulty finding the place. It was hidden...really hidden. You see...Yangarra Park is owned by Kendall Jackson...they're kind of private and have LOTS and LOTS of money. I was a little hesitant before arriving thinking that it would be a boring mega-corporate affair. There was absolutely no sign marking the property. We figured out that we were in the right place when we saw the electric fence guarding property in the middle of nowhere. Only KJ would do that out here. There were lots of trees so we couldn't see into the property either. We drove up the drive slowly and were greeted by a couple of vineyard managers. They were again very kind and down to earth and one of them was hot (as the girls seemed to think). The head vineyard manager took us for a rough and tumble drive through the vineyards and showed us experimental rows with different vine-training and some colossaly thick old bush vines. It was pretty cool. We finished our drive around the property and we were greeted with the most beautiful surprise ever... We were greeted by a roaring fire next to a pond on the property. There was a picnic table with a beautiful arrangement of cheeses, bread, and such as well as their wines to taste. There was absolutely no pressure. Taste what you want and enjoy yourself. They figured that we'd had a long day and they wanted us to enjoy ourselves casually. The fire was grand and they were baking "damper bread" for us right in the fire. Great stuff! They then asked if we'd like to fish the pond. They brought out some fishing rods and let us fish the pond for yarbies. It was so relaxing that none of us wanted to leave. We were having the time of our lives. They had a great dog with lots of energy. We all had fun playing fetch with him but I think Nathan was especially taken. It couldn't get any more casual, fun, and relaxing. None of us caught a yarbie and we didn't care (I somehow managed to get my line caught in an overhead power line, but eventually coaxed my lure back to earth). We certainly wouldn't have minded staying all night, but we had further obligations. It was grey and misty, but absolutely perfect. On the surface it looks like the mega-corporate KJ had never heard of their own property...that is very refreshing as it is one of my best memories. Thanks Yangarra Park!

Karen drove us back to Adelaide as night was approaching so that we could attend the Taste of the Best fete at the Adelaide Showgrounds. The "Taste of the Best" was a giant wine tasting where the winners of the Royal Adelaide Wine Show were featured. There were thousands of wines in a room almost the size of 747 hangar. I've never seen so many open wines in my life. Spit buckets were actually giant garbage cans spaced about the room filled with saw dust. At this tasting you can take any bottle you want and pour as much as you want. It was so big an expansive that it was really overwhelming. It was fairly crowded and the line to the top award winning wines was pretty long. We as a group decided it was just too much to take in and took some taxis downtown. Our cab driver who didn't speak much English (apparently it's an international rule for cab drivers not to speak the language of the country they are driving in) couldn't find the Earl of Aberdeen Pub (now the Coopers Ale House). We stopped and Shayn went into a place for directions. It was a strip-club. That was pretty funny. We drove around a bit and decided to get out because we knew we were in the vicinity. We eventually found the Earl of Aberdeen and stepped inside. We were supposed to meet Jan to watch the first World Cup Rugby match of the Australia Wallabies vs. Argentina. It was packed! It was like the Gaelic League or the Old Shillelagh on St. Patrick's Day. They even had sod laid down on the floor in one of the rooms. It was a raucus good time. I had several pulled pints of Coopers Stout (YUM!). Jan was there with friends and colleagues and we were just having the grandest time. Eventually Jan, Brittney, and myself decided that we should probably get something to eat. The formal dining room at the pub was shutting down for the evening so we had to make other plans. We walked outside and found a simple Balinese restaurant next door called Pondok Bali (310 Pultney St.). I ordered Balinese spring rolls for the table, a Singha (beer) and a whole fried barramundi (fish) with spicy dipping sauce and rice. Damn fine! The place was not overly complicated but the owner was very friendly and the barramundi was memorable. You'll notice that there is a very large Asian/Indonesian influence and presence in Australia.

Nathan walked by and noticed us and sat down. We talked for a bit and Nathan and Brittney and I decided to walk back to hotel. Brittney and I bought Jan's dinner (it's the least we could do as she made the whole free trip to Australia possible) and the three of us headed back to the Hilton. We stopped at a gas station for snacks and such. I think I bought a milk and a Cherry Ripe (Cherry Ripe is one of the biggest selling confections of's pretty darn good). We strutted off with our wares and made our way to the entrance of the Adelaide Hilton. We said goodnight and went off to our respective rooms. My clothes were laundered and pressed and hanging in my closet. Great frickin' hotel (even if Paris Hilton's family owns it)! I drank my milk, brushed my teeth and crashed in the world's most comfortable bed. We had another big day in store for us tomorrow...

Until the next time...G'day
To be continued...


Just a quickie...

Have you seen the Saturday Night Live commercial for "Dr. Porkenheimer's Boner Juice"? Pretty f'in funny...


Saturday, April 16, 2005

Where are they now? A look at celebrity disintegration...

I was just wondering what happened to a few celebrities. Whatever happened to...

El DeBarge
Gil Gerard
The guy that played the dad in Silver Spoons.
The hosts of Real People.
Erin Gray (which ties to both Gil Gerard and Silver Spoons)
Pam Dawber (Is she still married to Mark Harmon?)
The other kid in Silver Spoons (not Ricky, Alfonso, or Jason Bateman).
The entire cast of The Love Boat.
The hosts of That's Incredible!
Howard Hessman (I love ya Howard...where are ya?)
The guy from Mr. Belvedere.
The cast of Night Court (other than John Larroquette).
Color Me Badd (not that I care)
Philip Michael Thomas (Miami Vice)
Kristy McNichol
Jackie Earle Haley (Bad News Bears)
The entire cast of Head of the Class (other than Howard Hessman and Billy Connolly)
Gabe Kaplan (I think he's involved with Pro-Poker)
Max Gail (Barney Miller)
Peter Billingsly
Eileen Brennan
The women from Bosom Buddies.
Bud Cort (I know that he was in the last Wes Anderson film, but where was he for the last 30 or so years?)
The guy that played the mechanic in CHIPS.
Adrian Zmed
Heather Thomas
Lee Majors
Lindsay Wagner
John Colicos
The guys that played TC and Rick on Magnum PI.
Dom Deluise

And why can't people like Ashlee Simpson, Paris Hilton, and Ryan Seacrest fade into obscurity already? They are all dingleberries on the ass of life and need to be wiped away.


Wednesday, April 13, 2005

My inner European...

Your Inner European is Italian!

Passionate and colorful.

You show the world what culture really is.

10 signs that I'm getting old...

I'm only 32, but here are 10 signs that I'm getting old...

1. I'd rather sit than stand for a concert.
2. I've got a few weird white hairs in my dark-blondish goatee.
3. I complain about the music kids listen to these days. Not, however, because it's too weird, experimental, or loud. Rather, because it's too lame, limp, quiet, or generally shitty. I'd love to see the reaction of an Ashlee Simpson or 3 Doors Down fan listening to Einsturzende Neubauten or some older Ministry. There's still good music being made today, but a lot of it is being listened to by freaks like me.
4. I have freaky "old man" nose hairs. I didn't think that I'd have to trim my nose hairs for another 20 years or so.
5. I find myself using expressions like...
"Back in my day..."
"When I was your age..."
"You kids have it so easy today..."
(I haven't caught myself yet using the "uphill both ways, barefoot..." story yet.)
6. I have to read several magazines to keep up with the current slang.
7. "Preferred Driver" savings on my car insurance.
8. Although I wasn't born when John F. Kennedy was assassinated, I do have a "Kennedy" moment. Perhaps the closest thing people of my generation have to relate to the Kennedy assassination is the Space Shuttle Challenger explosion. I remember where I was. I was in the 8th grade in Mrs. Pitt's Algebra class at Waldo Middle School in Salem, Oregon when the announcement was made. My science teacher (Mrs. Whitley) was showing it live during her class. I was a member of the Young Astronauts of America and she was our sponsor/leader. I remember seeing her cry. I also remember the first take-off and landing of the Columbia. Where were you when the Challenger exploded?
9. Kids should be spanked, not given "time-outs".
10.My balls have finally dropped.


I'm baaaaack!

Hello y'all. I'm back. I got my new computer this morning. UPS came right when I got out of the shower. I wouldn't have known if it weren't for my landlords' dog Huey barking like crazy. Huey doesn't bark at USPS or many walkers-by, but as soon as he hears the UPS truck he goes absolutely apeshit. I hurried to get some clothes on before the driver left. I wanted to get it on the first delivery try. Done. The printer will be coming shortly (separately). Dude! I've got a Dell! I'm still using dial-up, but hopefully that will be remedied soon. At least I can post at the speed of sloth again.

Not much to report otherwise. I'm rather uninspired as work has been nothing but turd and tribulation lately. I may be going insane. What's new?


Monday, April 04, 2005

Blog break update...

Dude! I'm getting a Dell! I just ordered a new computer today. I'll finally have my own (not my roommate's). It should be here in 3-5 days, so hopefully I'll be online at home again by the end of the week.

Blog break...

I won't be able to post for a while as there are some severe computer-issues at home. I can't really blog from work, so it'll probably be a couple of weeks. Sorry.

Friday, April 01, 2005

What April Fool's joke should I play?

Your Prank is Playing Some Human Pinata

7 great albums by bands that you've probably never heard of...

Back in my college-radio days (WUMD) we used to get a fair amount of freebie (promo) CDs. A lot of them are crap and you'll see them dominating the used bins at record stores across the country. Here are 7 albums that I haven't tried to sell/trade...

1. "Providence" - The Rosemarys (Kind of American shoe-gazerish)
2. "The Nightblooms" - The Nightblooms (Great f'in album! Actually, I think I bought this one.)
3. "Those Deep Buds" - Dog Faced Hermans (Dutch ska/punk/weird...good)
4. "Viva Dead Ponies" - Fatima Mansions (Okay, you may have heard of the Fatima Mansions, but this is a seriously underrated album.)
5. "And She Closed Her Eyes" - Stina Nordenstam (Beautiful album from a potential Swedish Bjork)
6. "Minimal Star" - trains and boats and planes (A bunch of great pun intended. Really cool album.)
7. "Dreamcake" - Jale (I used to have this album and ended up trading it in years ago. I found it in a used-bin recently and bought it again. Great girl band on SubPop)


My head smells coconutty...

I finally went to get a haircut today (Bob's Hair Salon in Taylor). Times are finally changing. I've been going to Bob's since I moved to Michigan in 1987. I think haircuts were $8.00 back then, it's up to thirteen bucks now, but I'm happy to pay it. The interior of Bob's has been the same for the last 18 years. The theme has been "dark wood paneling". Not much to look at other than the deer head and deer pictures mounted on the walls. I walked in today to an unfamiliar brightness. They've actually painted the walls a sort of beige coloring with green trim. They're still going to re-mount the deer head and put up a picture of Bob (Bob passed away a couple of years ago). Luckily there was no wait when I got there and got the fabulous Reyna (SP?). She put a new gel in my hair and now I smell like a coconut. Not a real coconut, or a Mounds bar, but more like Coppertone or Malibu Rum...uber-coconutty. I'll take a shower before I go in to the restaurant tonight to get the smell of sunbather off of me as well as get the remaining few itchy hairs off of me. I'm sure you all wanted the sordid details.

It looks as if the Pope is finally going to pass away. I'm not Catholic or even very religious, but he seems like a pretty good guy. Any issues I have with him are issues that I have with the Catholic church. He'll be missed.

I grew up with the Lutheran Church-Missouri Synod. I have some great memories and met lots of great people. I stopped going to church when I got a job that required me to work on Sunday mornings. I had been listening to others for years, but then I got a chance to listen to myself. I have no qualms with the Lutheran Church. They're mostly very good people and I don't regret my upbringing. I essentially liked every aspect of the church except for the whole "God" thing. I'm not exactly sure what I believe in, but I don't think that organized religion is the thing for me. I believe that most of the world's religions have something good to bring to the table. I'm not a multi-thiest, but I essentially believe in being a good person. I think everyone's basic tennet should be "Be nice." Treat people, animals, and the environment respectful...don't as honest as possible...avoid war and conflict at all nice. I have a childhood memory about discrimination. I was fairly aware of being nice and non-discriminatory on my felt right. But then I would see these signs above the doors of bars and on cigarette machines that said "No Minors" and "Not For Sale to Minors". I thought that it was unfair to discriminate against minors. Why can't minors buy cigarettes or have a drink? It didn't make any sense to me. Turns out that when I was young I didn't know the difference between "minors" and "miners". I thought that bars and cigarette machines were discriminating against miners...the kind that dig and blow things up. Luckily it all makes sense now, but at the time I thought it was unfair for people to be restricted from certain things simply because they may have been dirty or covered in soot. I've been keenly aware of trying not to hurt any person's or group's feelings ever since. I look back at childhood memories from time to time and sometimes have a good laugh.

I finally saw The Incredibles the other night. I thought it was good, but not really worthy of an Oscar. It does, however, strengthen my opinion of Sarah Vowell. She played the voice of Violet. She's also an essayist for This American Life on NPR and has written two fabulous books, Take the Cannoli and The Partly Cloudy Patriot. She's an insanely funny and bright history buff. She's also an occasional guest on Conan O'Brien. She has a new book coming out soon. I think I may have a celebrity crush on her.

I know that I can't win the AOL NCAA bracket pool, but I'll be interested to see how things turn out. I'm doing pretty dang well for a guy that would rather go to the opera than a sporting event.

Have a great weekend!